Reflecting on 2010!

Yesterday morning I sat outside on my balcony reading my Bible, thinking about this past year, and writing in my journal.

As I looked through my Bible I noticed that my Bible tells the story of each year I am in Honduras. The verses I have underlined I remember what was happening at that time, what struggles I was having, or what I was praying for, or what promises God was showing me.

Luke 9:23-24 "Then he said to them all: 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it."

Take up your cross daily. This was a constant theme for my year it seemed - not thinking about myself or what I wanted, but serving in the place I was. Sometimes that meant with the class of students that I had. I struggled a lot with some of these kids, and I wasn't always happy going to class....but every day I reminded myself that none of this was about me. It was about God and the job He had given me, and He had given me this class.

There were other times during this year - robberies, having my computer stolen, feeling lost and alone and separated from my family, that I would read this verse that I had hung on the wall of my bedroom. Many days I had to pray through this, for God to help me and remind me that it wasn't about me....but it was about following Him and directing these kids to Him.

Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

I remember waking up one Sunday morning during a time where I just felt like things were in chaos, I had students behind, students who were acting out in class, other students who I worked with outside of class I was worrying about....so much going on and I woke up and God brought this verse to my mind. I had to just give it all to him....Be still and know that I am God....I couldn't do the things I was trying to do in my own power....that was another verse that ended up hanging on my wall....so I could read it every day before I walked out the door.

I had to do that many times this year... sit and be quiet and just know that God is God! And what comfort that gave me when I did that!

Isaiah 65:24 "Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear."

Jeremiah 29:12-14 after the famous Jeremiah 29:11... I know the plans I have for you...

v. 12 "Then they will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you."
v. 13 " you will seek me and find me when you seek me with your whole heart."
v. 14 "I will be found by you, declares the Lord......"

What awesome promises I found in this verses! Oh the prayers I have for Joshua and for my kids here!

Psalm 126: 5- 6 "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy carrying sheaves with him."

Well I certainly did a lot of weeping - sometimes in sadness over the kids, sometimes with the kids because of hard times they were going through personally, sometimes just weeping because I have such a burden for them for what I want for them.

What an awesome promise that I will return with songs of joy!

Ecclesiastes 11: 1-6 I read these verses on August 8, 2010 - Oh it gave me such a lift! I was at a point where I was feeling like nothing I did mattered, nothing was making a difference in the lives of my students or any of the kids - But continue to sow! Do not give up!

"Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again. Give portions to seven, yes to eight, for you do not know what disaster may come upon the land. If clouds are full of water they pour rain upon the earth. Whether a tree falls to the south or to the north, in the place where it falls, there it will lie. Whoever watches the wind will not plant; whoever looks at the clouds will not reap. As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in the mother's womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things. Sow your seed in the morning, and at evening let not your hands be idle, for you do not know which will succeed, whether this or that, or whether both will do equally well."

I read these verses about the same time I read Psalm 126:5-6 - I was really feeling like I was doing nothing - Maybe I am not seeing the results that I want - but I should and will continue!

It was that last verse of Ecclesiastes that really hit me - continue to sow every where, all the time, because you don't know where the fruit will come from...so just keep on keeping on!

In October, 2010 I read Psalm 127: 3-5 "Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them."

I only have one son, Joshua, and I am blessed so much to have him as my son! But also, as I read those verses I also began thinking of all my "kids" I have here. I don't believe God is only talking about natural children. There are many children that God has put in my heart! I love them, look after them, pray for them, like they were my own kids. How blessed am I to have Joshua and to be given the awesome responsibility of loving on so many more kids! I am blessed!

These are just some highlights...but some of the verses that stick out, meant the most to me this year, some days helped me just get through the day by remembering God's promises!

I am so proud of my son for being in the Army and I love him and pray for him every day! Some verses that God showed me shortly after he joined the Army have been a constant prayer of mine for Joshua, and as his assignment changes I know this will be my prayer for him daily!

Psalm 121 "I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip - he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord watches over you - the Lord is your shade at your right hand; The sun will not harm you by day nor the moon by night.
The Lord will keep you from all harm - He will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore."

Today is the graduation of our Ruach students, the Preppa students will graduate to 1st grade, my 6th grade class will graduate into highschool, and our two seniors will graduate and be ready to move on to studying medicine. It is certainly a day to celebrate today! Celebrate all the students' accomplishments. I am so proud of them, each one, and excited to see what the future holds for them.

What a fun and exciting time this year was with Convention and International Student Convention getting to accompany the kids on that trip, and getting to know new students, getting to take weekend trips with highschool, and overcoming many hardships and trials and seeing God's hand in all of it!

Today the Preppa students will be doing a dance, choreographed by Miss Helen, to IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT....then my 6th grade class will be singing HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD....what an awesome end to the 2010 School Year!